What I'm Reading...

Well, I gave up on Beloved. Admittedly, I gave up too soon; I hadn't even read ten full pages. I started the book in a too-tired state and just didn't have the guts to pick it up again after that. The next thing I knew, Christmas had come, and I had received a beautiful pile of books that I had asked for, books that I had been wanting, really wanting, to read. So, I removed my bookmark from Beloved, promising to return to it again someday, apologizing for my abandonment, and I picked up Julie & Julia.

I'm about halfway through Julie Powell's memoir of the year she cooked through Julia Child's Mastering the Art of French Cooking and, so far, it is hilarious. Powell is brutally honest and writes with amazing humor. This book is laugh-out-loud funny, and I can't wait to finish it.

What I Just Finished...

I think it may be safe to say that Jodi Picoult is my new favorite author. After reading My Sister's Keeper earlier this year, I knew I had to read more of Picoult's work. Day before yesterday, I started reading Harvesting the Heart, and I finished it today.

I was hooked from the beginning. Picoult has the ability to create riveting fiction with fantastic literary qualities, and the best part is, she doesn't sugar-coat life. She tells real stories of real people. She forces her readers to think critically about life. She presents life's sticky situations in ways I've never considered them before; she makes me think, really think, about things. Novels that make me really think are some of my favorite kinds to read.

I hope to have the opportunity to read the rest of Picoult's books; I imagine they're just as good, if not better, than the two I've already been exposed to.

To learn more about Jodi Picoult and her work go here.

The Prints of my Fingers

On Tuesday, I had my fingerprints taken.

Relax, I didn't do anything illegal to warrant this action. In order to receive my initial teaching license upon graduation, my fingerprints need to be documented and run by the Arkansas State Police, FBI, and Child Protective Services to make sure I'm not a scary criminal.

I can't lie, I was pretty excited about this fingerprinting. So, if you're a wonderer like me and you've never been fingerprinted, I'll tell you what its like.

First of all, it's a little more complicated than it seems. In the event that you're finger printed, you'll be tempted to do it yourself; however, you must be patient and relaxed as the officer twists your fingers around so that they produce the perfect print.

The "stamp pad," if you will, of ink isn't like a stamp pad you and I are used to either. It feels like a cool, almost damp table top. It is red.

So, you let the officer roll your fingers on to the red stamp pad and then press them on to your very own fingerprint sheet. Then, the officer instructs you to wash your hands, and by the time you return, he has placed your fingerprint sheet into a magic drying box and when he retrieves it your fingerprints are no longer red; they've turned black.

It is so cool; I thought it was, anyway.

Well, folks, there you have it. That's how fingerprinting goes down.

This is a photo of a fingerprint sheet that I found on the internet. It looks a lot like mine, except these fingerprints happen to belong to Malcolm X. I wanted to take a picture of my sheet, but I sensed that might annoy the officer, so I refrained from asking.

You know how you don't want something until you can't have it? Well, here's the other thing about fingerprinting: NO LOTION. If you put lotion on your hands, the lotion fills in the lines, and your prints won't take properly. My teacher, Mr. W., had warned us extensively about this, so I was prepared live sans lotion on Tuesday.

But, oh golly goodness, how I longed to have lotion on my hands. Just to clarify, I'm not even a lotion fanatic. I love lotion, yes, but I don't have to use it every day. On Tuesday, though, I needed it. My hands felt dry and itchy and cracky and gross.

I cannot describe to you just how much knowing that I couldn't have lotion that morning made me want to use it, need to use it, even more. Once the fingerprinting was over, my hands felt totally fine and normal; the dryness, itchiness, and crackiness had all miraculously disappeared.

Isn't it weird how we sometimes want the one thing we can't have? I think it's a really funny part of our nature as humans (or at least my nature as a human).

For those of you wondering, I abstained from lotion use before my fingerprinting. =]

I hope you have a Happy Wednesday.

What's In a Name?

I realize that "The Middle Ground" is a difficult blog name to interpret if you were not present upon its creating. I probably should have explained the name of my blog in one of my first posts, but, you know how life is, you do what you can. :)

Anyway, I didn't chose a name like "The Random Thoughts of Jessica" or "A Day in the Life of Jessica" or "I Love Jonathan" or "Welcome to my World," not because any of those names are inherently bad, simply because they just aren't me.

I think that a name, even for a blog, is important. Names are, in a way, a definition, so I chose to give my blog a name that defined my life, one that defined me. After all, my blog doesn't exist to further an agenda that I have; my blog exists for me, for my friends, for my family, and for anyone else who happens upon this pit stop in cyber space. It's about my life, what I'm doing, hearing, seeing, and experiencing. It's about sharing learned information with others. It's about communication. It's about connection.

The name, "The Middle Ground," was the result of a variety of conversations between some of my closest friends and I about our lives. We were laughing and joking that nothing exciting ever happens to us here in Searcy.

The consensus at the conclusion of the conversation went something like this:

"There's the exciting life, the boring life, and the mediocre life. We have mediocre lives. We're the middle ground; not too exciting, but not too boring either."

I decide that I really like the middle ground. My life isn't so exciting that I can't take pleasure in the little things, nor is it so boring that I feel the need to be ashamed of it. My life is in the middle, and I think that's where I'll choose to keep it. Life in the middle ground is beautiful. I am a regular person, not so regular that I can't be an individual, but not so individual that I can't be regular.

I enjoy the life that I lead with my family and friends. We have a great time. Sometimes we're running so fast through life that we can hardly catch our breaths and sometimes the days move so slowly that they feel like years and sometimes we're drowning in the ocean of heartache and sometimes we're having so much fun we can hardly stand it; that's what the middle ground, the mediocre life, is like.

Thus, "The Middle Ground" was born. As a representation of myself and extension of my thoughts and feelings, I thought it only appropriate to honor this blog with a name that described my life so accurately.

Thanksgiving 2009: In a Nutshell

This Thanksgiving was different than all the other Thanksgivings of my lifetime. For the first time ever, I spent Thanksgiving somewhere other than Newport, Arkansas.

My parents, Jonathan, and I piled up in the car on Sunday afternoon and drove to Seaside, FL for our "Planning Day" that kicks off the wedding plans. We drove half way on Sunday and finished up the drive on Monday. After eating lunch and taking a couple of minutes to unload the car, we piled into the car again and took off on quite the adventurous ride to look at reception venues. That lasted all afternoon and was immediately followed by dinner and extreme exhaustion.

Tuesday was our official "Planning Day" in Seaside and began at 9:00 in the morning. We met with our wedding coordinator, Heather, then we met with three photographers, met with Heather again to check out the chapel, had a cake tasting, and then met with two florists. Yet again, exhaustion ensued.

Wednesday, we met with a cake baker, a videographer, two reception venues, and looked at some dishes. I think by now you surely get the exhaustion routine.

Then came Thanksgiving :) Our last day in Seaside, we relaxed. We slept in, watched the parade, went to a movie, and had a great time.

Today, Friday, we drove all ten hours home.

Overall, the week was exciting and stressful and fun and frightening and overwhelming and exhilarating and a lot of other things all rolled into one extremely strange emotional package.

Anyway, I still don't feel like Thanksgiving has come and gone. This week was totally surreal; I still don't feel like it's time to plan my wedding, but I'm excited nonetheless.

The 'g word' and other thoughts.

Okay, so I know it isn't Christmas yet, but I get in 'holiday mode' a couple of weeks after Halloween. I love, love love this time of year. I always enjoy watching the color of the leaves change and stepping on crunchy leaves as I walk around campus (I know it's a weird fascination, but I enjoy it nonetheless).

Tomorrow marks the last day of school before Thanksgiving break :) I CANNOT wait. Even though I'm going to have a lot of homework to do over the week-long furlough, I'm still looking forward to it. A break's a break, right? I thought so, too.

The only issue I have with the approaching holiday is the approaching end of said holiday, because then it's crunch time in the school world. We're talking serious amounts of work. It always amazes me how much I can get done the two weeks before finals.

Now that I've brought up finals, I'll lay it back to rest (in a second), because the mention of finals means the mention of the end of the semester which means the mention of the beginning of the next semester which means the mention of the end of the next semester which means the mention of graduation which makes me nervous. I know I probably shouldn't be compartmentalizing all of the upcoming changes in my life, but I am. End of story. Okay, well, that's enough. No more mention of the 'g word.' Got it? Good.

You have GOT to be kidding me

I know the Twilight series is big; I know it's popular. I've read all four books. Were they terrible? No. In all fairness, I found the novels relatively interesting, and, for the most part, they held my attention.

Literarily, though, I was unimpressed.

Do we seriously need to compare Stephanie Meyer to the likes of William Shakespeare, Jane Austen, and Emily Bronte? Absolutely NOT.

Aside from the issues I have with Meyer's portrayal of women and love in the novels and any other issues I might have, literarily speaking, there is no comparison between the Twilight series and the brilliant works of literature above.

I feel very strongly that someone owes Shakespeare, Austen, and Bronte a big, big, big apology.

What I Just Finished...

Tender Mercies: Inside the World of a Child Abuse Investigator is a narrative written by CPS caseworker Keith Richards. I read this book for an assignment in my Child Abuse & Neglect class.

Literarily, this book has little merit. It does read quickly and easily, and if you're interested in a CPS worker's point of view on his job and it's difficulties with a few example cases thrown in, then this book is for you.

What I Just Finished...

I just finished reading Edward P. Jones' The Known World, and I LOVED it! The novel has several characters and lacks a protagonist, but Jones manages to weave a story together through the interconnectedness of his character's lives that is both beautiful and inspiring.

The novel is set in Manchester County, Virginia, before the Civil War. Centering around the activities of various citizens of Manchester County, Jones highlights the perversion slavery brings to a society. His beautiful language and attention to detail reeled me in from page one.

Now, even though I greatly enjoyed this book, I might hesitate to recommend it to just anyone. Since Jones chooses to use so many characters, it can be confusing, especially in the beginning, trying to keep everyone straight. However, once I got to know the characters, this problem went away. Another thing that some people may be bothered by is that there is no definite protagonist. Sure, there are characters who play a greater role in the novel than others do, but it would be difficult to pinpoint only one main character. I can see how this would be annoying or confusing to some people, but I found it interesting. The lack of a protagonist, for me, gave the opportunity to look at and experience the lives and feelings of each of the characters, instead of limiting myself to just one.

With those disclaimers aside, I must say that this book is definitely on my list of favorites.

I hope you'll pick it up and give it try!

Driver Calls 911 to Report Herself as Drunk

I read this on MSN today:

Associated Press

updated 8:08 p.m. CT, Mon., Nov . 2, 2009

NEILSVILLE, Wis. - The call came into the 911 dispatcher: "I don't want to hurt anybody. I'm drunk." And with that, Mary Strey, 49, of Granton, reported herself as a drunken driver about three miles northeast of Neilsville in central Wisconsin.

Clark County Sheriff's Chief Deputy Jim Backus said Monday that Strey's call on Oct. 24 led deputies to cite her for misdemeanor drunken driving with a blood-alcohol level double the legal limit to drive. She makes her first court appearance Dec. 10.

Backus said drunken drivers reporting themselves is rare.

In the 911 call, Strey said she wanted to report a drunken driver and the dispatcher asked if she was behind the suspect vehicle. "I am them," Strey said. She then followed the dispatcher's advice to pull over and turn on her flashers, telling him she had been "drinking all night long."

"Backus said drunken drivers reporting themselves is rare." Really? Who would've guessed that? :)

At least this woman was honest enough to get herself off of the road before she hurt herself or someone else. I can't help but wonder, now that she is being charged, does she regret reporting herself? IF it were me, I'd probably be wishing right about now that I hadn't taken the high road and turned myself in, but I think I'll give her the benefit of the doubt, and say that she turned herself in knowingly, still remembers this action, and is willing to serve for her punishment in any way the courts deem necessary. A big part of me wonders if such will be the case.

Despite all my ponderings, I couldn't help but giggle a little at this story. We generally stop telling on ourselves at an early age, and I think it's humorous that this woman told on her self in such a way that she will face legal consequences. I also think this action is commendable and honorable. Perhaps life would be easier and the world a much better place if we were all willing and able to admit our faults and ask for help, if nothing more than for the sake of those around us.

Goin' to the chapel...quite literally.

In 264 days (that's July 24, 2010), Jonathan and I are getting married in the Interfaith Chapel at Seaside, Florida. Here's a picture >>>>>>>

Get excited.

The Fire Drill

I fear that one day the students in any given dormitory at Harding University, including myself, may all burn up and die. Why, you ask? Let me tell you, friend.

When a fire alarm sounds in a Harding dorm (okay, so I can't speak for EVERY dorm but I can for the three I've lived in), it is perceived as a nuisance, not a warning of imminent danger. Admittedly, I also despise the torturous, infernal sound that the fire alarm brings. I don't rush out the door faster than anyone else. In fact, the last time the fire alarm went off in my dorm (Monday) I took care to put on a different pair of pants, put socks and shoes on my bare feet, shut down my computer, search around for a book I wanted to take, and turn out all the lights in my apartment. The only reason I did these things semi-quickly is because of that sound, that horrid, ear piercing, maddening sound that the alarm makes inside my room.

Everyone knows that the fire alarm means there is a fire. However, since we have witnessed the alarm go off indiscriminately on several occasions, the alarm has lost its meaning. Dormitory fire alarms have lost their power. Instead of alerting students of danger, fire alarms are seen as annoying interruptions of life and are definitely not taken seriously.

Is this dangerous? Probably. Will anyone care? Probably not. Will I hurry when the dorm's fire alarm sounds again (because we all know it will)? Probably not.

I wish there was a way to keep humans from numbing themselves to warning signs like fire alarms, but I'm afraid there is not. It is my sincere hope that if a real fire breaks out in a dorm that by some gracious act of God, we will take it seriously and all arrive safely out of the building. The fact that we think we are invincible scares me, but I hope we never have to find out how invicible we really are.

'Mermaid Girl' dies at age 10

The Associated Press

9:47 a.m. EDT, October 26, 2009

PORTLAND, Maine - Shiloh Pepin, a girl who was born with fusedlegs, a rare condition often called "mermaid syndrome," and gained a wide following on the Internet and national television, has died. She was 10.

Doctors had predicted she would only survive only for days after her birth at the most, but the girl, described by her mother as "a tough little thing," died at Maine Medical Center on Friday afternoon, hospital spokesman John Lamb said. She had been hospitalized in critical condition for nearly a week.

Being born with "mermaid syndrome," also known as sirenomelia, meant that the Kennebunkport girl had only one partially working kidney, no lower colon or genital organs and legs fused from the waist down.

Some children who have survived sirenomelia have had surgery to separate their legs, but Shiloh did not because blood vessels crossing from side to side in her circulatory system would have been severed. She had received two kidney transplants, the last one in 2007.

Her story was featured recently on "The Oprah Winfrey Show" and other national television programs.

Earlier this month, her mother, Leslie Pepin, said her daughter came down with a cold that quickly turned to pneumonia. Shiloh rushed to Maine Medical Center on Oct. 10 and was placed on antibiotics and a ventilator.

For a while, Leslie Pepin said, things were looking up. "She's a tough little thing," she said of her daughter earlier this week.

Shiloh was a fifth-grader at Kennebunkport Consolidated School. "She was such a shining personality in that building," said Maureen King, chairwoman of the board of the regional school district. Counselors will be available next week to talk to students.

Through the television shows, news articles, Facebook and other Web sites, Shiloh inspired many.

"I live in Iowa. I have cerebral palsy. I love your video," 12-year-old Lydia Dawley wrote to Shiloh on Facebook. "You have a great personality I wish you lived close so we could be friends and hang out. You opened my eyes because you are so brave."

Farwell, Emily (for now)

Well, it's over (my Senior Symposium, that is).

I presented my paper at 3:00 today along with Tabitha and Sadie (some of my dearest friends) who are also English majors. My presentation went rather smoothly, and thanks to an amazing second reader, I was asked questions that were coherent and answerable.

Overall, I count this day as a success! I feel as though an enormous burden has been lifted off of my shoulders. Throughout this process, I learned so many things, and I am quite grateful to have had this experience.

I am surprised to find that I still love Emily Dickinson's poetry, for I was afraid that I would grow tired of hearing her voice and trying to delve into the inner workings of her mind. Perhaps I tired of this a little, but not as much as I thought I would. Granted, I do not want to talk about her poems on death or anything about negative capability for the next several days, but I am not completely burned out on the discussion ;).

Mostly, I am just glad to be finished. Senior Symposium is a milestone, another rite of passage for the undergrad, and I completed it. Thank goodness.

A Celebration Is in Order....Almost

Well, I am rid of my paper on Emily Dickinson..almost! Truthfully, I think I'll never be done thinking about Dickinson and the way she used death as a prominent theme in her poetry.

Anyhow, this post is one of a celebratory nature because today I turned in my final draft of my senior symposium paper! Upon submitting my paper, I felt quite an array of emotions: relief, nervousness, excitement; all sorts of things ran around in my head. Now, all I can do is hope that all of my hard work pays off in the end.

My presentation is Friday, and that is a completely different adventure in and of itself. No worries, I'll keep you updated ;)

What I Just Finished...

I just finished reading Wanting, a novel by Richard Flanagan.

Reading this book was an assignment for the Post Colonial Literature course I'm taking this semester, and I am pleased to report that I greatly enjoyed Flanagan's work. It is always nice to be assigned to read something that you truly end up enjoying.

Flanagan's diction was refreshing and thought provoking, and I appreciated his writing style. The novel is separated into two stories that flip-flop from chapter to chapter. At first, this flip-flop organization confused me a little, but once I understood what was going on it stopped bothering me. Flanagan borders on historical fiction, using historical figures to shape his story, but he does use enough creative license to make this work a truly fictional novel.

Overall, I found this book to be an enjoyable read. It is quite easy to get through, but it does provide thought provoking insight into the power struggle of humanity. Admitting that I have not delved too far into the genre of Post Colonial literature, I must say that from what I have read, Flanagan has thus far been one of my favorite authors.

The Ouachita Trail! :-D

This has been an incredible weekend.

1. I found out, thanks to my wonderful teacher who messaged me because she knew I was worried, that I made a 'B' on the Brit Lit exam that I thought I failed.

2. I did well on my GRE.

3. Jonathan and I got engaged!!

Here's our story:

We went to hike one of the trails at Pinnacle Mountain State Park. As we started walking, he told me that since I was hiking for him, he had presents for me in his backpack, thirteen to be exact, that I could open along the way. We started our hike along Ouachita Trail (the one that goes all the way to Oklahoma, but we didn't make it that far, haha), and I started opening my gifts one by one. We found a huge rock with a beautiful little creek midway through, so we sat there for a few minutes and talked. we kept going until the trail was so muddy we felt like we had to turn around (and I was halfway through my presents). When we got back to the little creek, we decided to rest there again, and I got to open more presents. I sat on the boulder and Jonathan stood next to me and we talked for quite a while. He asked me if I understood what all my presents were (they all represented something that we'd done together), and said yes and told him how sweet they all had been and how much I appreciated them. The next thing I knew, he was down on one knee, holding out my grandmother's ring, and asking me to marry him. Of course, I said yes.

That's the big rock I sat on :-)

This is right after he asked me. These are our super, duper excited faces!

This is during our walk, just before we got engaged.

My presents were:

--3D Sidewalk Chalk: This is the only gift that didn't represent something we'd already done, but he knew I had really been wanting to try some.

--Clothes for Ellen: Ellen is my Build-A-Bear that Jonathan got me for Christmas back in 2006.

--A Little Stuffed Turtle: We love, love, love to go to the Georgia Aquarium every time we go to Atlanta.

--A Cross Ornament: We share and grow together in our faith.

--Great American Cookies: A chocolate chip one for me, snickerdoodle for him. We like to get a cookies sometimes when we go to the mall.

--A Penguin Christmas Ornament: Every Christmas that we've been together, we have each gotten each other an ornament (and I LOVE penguins).

--Mickey Mouse Scrapbook Stickers: Our trip to Disney World last fall with my parents.

--Beach Scrapbook Stickers: Our Florida trips.

--Chicago Scrapbook Stickers: Our trip to Chicago with friends.

--A Pumpkin Candle Holder: The first present Jonathan ever got me was a pumpkin candle holder when I was his girlfriend in 7th grade. I thought a Halloween gift was too much, so I broke up with him (oops). I do still have the original candle holder, by the way.

--Peanut M&Ms: They're my favorite movie snack.

--A Refrigerator Magnet featuring Scarlett O'Hara: We went to a themed graduation party in high school as Scarlett and Rhett.

--A Red, Hot Wheels Ferrari: He couldn't find a red Hot Wheels Thunderbird, so he settled for the Ferrari to represent my dad's Thunderbird that we took to prom.

You Know You're Losing It When....

• You are about to exit RIGHT off of the interstate and you put your LEFT blinker on, for more than a millisecond.
• You become irate when the side dorm door is locked. You know the one that is always locked that you have to swipe your card and enter a PIN to open?
• You start to take someone else's paper from the library printer, after you've already stapled it nicely.
• You lay your cell phone in the dishwasher and carry your dirty plate to the living room with you.
• You search for your glasses only to realize they're on your face.
• You have way more than five stories like those above, all of which took place in one day.

Needless to say, I've been laughing at myself all day. Please feel free to do the same.

How Quickly Life Does Move!

I cannot believe it's already midterm week! It seems like this semester is flying by (the same observation I usually make about every semester, haha!).

So far, this has been one of my busiest semesters, but what's a senior year for anyway?

I'm turning in my senior symposium paper on Monday. I can't believe it's already time for that, but I am pretty excited to get it in. When I was assigned such an early presentation date (Oct. 23), I thought it would be awful to have to get everything done so quickly. However, after going through the process and learning how time consuming it is, I have realized that presenting on the first date is a blessing for me. After the 23rd, it's over and done with, so I'll have a little more time in my schedule to get more done and have a little extra free time (hopefully ;-).

I just finished reading Shakespeare's Twelfth Night, and I loved it! I'm excited to start reading Wanting by Richard Flanagan. It's an assignment for my Post Colonial Lit class, so I hope it's good. I'll let you know :)

A New Beginning...Again

I'm big on journals. I think writing is important and healthy; it helps make life make sense.

I've kept tons and tons of journals and diaries throughout my life. The only problem is I end up forgetting to write, and then I quit them all together. The same thing goes for blogs. I start one, I quit one, I start one, I quit one...it's endless.

So, here I go again. I sincerely hope that this blog will survive, but I guess only time will tell.

:)